Tuesday, 14 May 2013

A-Z - this time I am evaluating B .... (bad manners and bullying)

Next on my list is the letter B!!
Now for this I could not decide whether to select BAD MANNERS or BULLYING.
So I have gone for both on the tenuous link that bullying could be construed as bad manners!!! (Maybe I am clutching at straws there?!)

BAD MANNERS.   Being a parent I have tried to install in my kids the importance of saying please and thank you, and just being polite in general! But it still shocks me how many children in their peer groups that do not even say a simple 'Ta!'
 I was raised that manners were more important than anything, the last words uttered to me before a party or tea at a friends house were "Remember your P's & Q's!" and I find myself repeating this to my own 2 if they are invited out. And I always get that flush of pride on their return when I am commended on their manners.
But still there are so many other people out there, adults as well as children who can not utter a word of thanks or show any manners. Is it any wonder that kids out there are growing up rude? 

Now I am not victorian in my standards - my children are taught to respect those who respect them. They are taught to consider other peoples feelings when out in the street or on public transport but I also try to teach them that there are older people out there who can be rude so in those cases civility is all that is needed. 

It is so simple to install good manners in children who tend to lead by example, children should be attending pre-school or nursery with the basics of manners already second nature. Although I have recently read something which states it should be the teachers job to teach manners.... I think this is codswallop!! Teachers suffer most of all from ill-mannered kids and they are constantly pulling them up on manners (they are when I am working in school anyway!!) So yeah... teachers should reinforce how important please and thank you are... but so should any adult who is contact with youngsters......

And BULLYING... I was a victim of bullying when I was at school, at one point I even had to move schools because of the trouble I faced. Mainly because I looked 'different' but also because I was gobby and answered back... I liked to shock with my appearance and this tended to cause comments from the more 'Trendy' people. In fact I used to have my own come backs stored in my head read for any hatred thrown my way. In this sense I was not bullied to the extent you read about in today's press. I was not beaten up or attacked physically. But I did end up in tears several times. I tried to be tough but found it unfair that how I looked made people hate me... 

Bullying is on this list because it has escalated now to the point where teens are stabbed and seriously hurt for no reason. TV programmes like Hollyoaks do serve to highlight the dangers from bullies but again it is mainly down to the parents. It is children who live with bullies and narrow mindedness who then repeat the process by picking on others. Again it is not difficult to teach children that all people regardless of colour, religion, sexuality, music tastes etc.... are the same inside. 

So there you have the letter B.... rather long winded and a bit of a rant but hey ho....

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Any comments and/or questions I am always happy to answer and will get back to you as soon as possible.
B xx